hold on, magnolia, i know what a true friend you've been.
home, sweet home. well, back to my domicile in missouri. i refuse to accept this strange land as my home. i dont believe that i have a real home anywhere right now. people say that home is where the heart is, but my heart is not attached to any specific residence at the moment. true, i do desire to live in canada, but there is no specific place there, no building, no city that i have spent a lot of time in to justify it as my home. i do have the house i grew up in back in new york, but i have, whether consciously or sub-consciously, estranged myself from that house. and i will never call myself a missourian. i think i would throw up until i died if i ever claimed that, even if it meant living in denial. so, i have no true home. but i plan on making either chicago, ontario, or another part of western new york my home in these coming months. either way, i should have friends nearby.
which brings me to the topic at hand: friends. i like friends. i like having friends. i like it when people consider me to be a friend. as mentioned in my last post, i told my readers that i was driving home for a funeral, to be with friends, etc. and i did that. i saw many people i haven't seen in quite some time, years in some cases. it was good to see them all, except for the circumstances that brought us together again. through this situation, i learned that i need to be a good friend to those close to me and keep them close, even if we are (hundreds of) miles apart. and that one friend i almost crossed off my list (see july 11 post), i know now not to discount her, and i am sorry for any thoughts of doing so. i just didn't understand the surrounding circumstances.
i also learned some other things while in the empire state. while making the first half of my 2000+ mile round trip drive, i was wondering if i was doing the right thing, if it was worth the trip. it was worth the trip and so much more. i would do it again if i had to. i think that through this whole ordeal i have found a piece of faith that i had lost or forgotten about. it is making me re-evaluate some values and beliefs, and also made me realize that i have been too cynical about some things. in a nutshell, it was a growing experiece. in a turtle-shell, it might have been a learning experience. but no matter what shell you put on it, it was a good experience.
south park season six is scheduled for release on october 11th, for those who care. i care. i care a lot.
which brings me to the topic at hand: friends. i like friends. i like having friends. i like it when people consider me to be a friend. as mentioned in my last post, i told my readers that i was driving home for a funeral, to be with friends, etc. and i did that. i saw many people i haven't seen in quite some time, years in some cases. it was good to see them all, except for the circumstances that brought us together again. through this situation, i learned that i need to be a good friend to those close to me and keep them close, even if we are (hundreds of) miles apart. and that one friend i almost crossed off my list (see july 11 post), i know now not to discount her, and i am sorry for any thoughts of doing so. i just didn't understand the surrounding circumstances.
i also learned some other things while in the empire state. while making the first half of my 2000+ mile round trip drive, i was wondering if i was doing the right thing, if it was worth the trip. it was worth the trip and so much more. i would do it again if i had to. i think that through this whole ordeal i have found a piece of faith that i had lost or forgotten about. it is making me re-evaluate some values and beliefs, and also made me realize that i have been too cynical about some things. in a nutshell, it was a growing experiece. in a turtle-shell, it might have been a learning experience. but no matter what shell you put on it, it was a good experience.
south park season six is scheduled for release on october 11th, for those who care. i care. i care a lot.
posted by goodbyedearsun at 1:43 PM
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